"We use the word courage very casually in leadership. Be courageous, they say, speak truth to power, challenge the status quo. But courage is very expensive."

Welcome to Part 2 of our deep dive into S2.E10 of the CI3 Fireside Chat: Speak-Up Cultures: Courageous Conversations That Change Projects with Roula Eid, Sara ElFeky and Adejisola B H Atiba . In Part 1, we exposed the illusion of the corporate open-door policy and examined how leaders unintentionally silence their teams. Today, we turn our attention to the mechanics of the conversation itself. It is one thing to know the truth; it is entirely another to deliver it in a way that actually alters the trajectory of a project.

In this issue, we will explore the "courage tax" placed on younger employees, the art of translating your dissent into a language executives actually hear, the frustrating reality of "private agreement," and why courage without competence is just noise.

1. The Courage Tax on Youth

During our live session, I shared a fascinating piece of data from the 2024 Institute of Business Ethics research: younger employees (aged 18 to 34) are significantly more likely to report concerns than their older counterparts. An impressive 70% of this demographic spoke up when they saw something wrong. However, the data also revealed a harsh reality, 52% of those younger employees reported experiencing retaliation for their courage.

This creates a paradox in the modern workplace. We beg our younger talent to bring fresh perspectives and disrupt old ways of thinking, but the moment they challenge the system, the system bites back. Roula Eid highlighted this exact trajectory, noting that early in our careers, we operate with a pure desire to prove what is right. But as we climb the hierarchy, the political stakes rise, and we learn to calculate our survival, often at the expense of our boldest ideas.

"Early in my career, I wanted to prove myself and I wanted to make something extraordinary. I didn't fear speaking up... Later on when I started growing up in hierarchy where politics took over, it was more difficult for me. I started calculating things." - Roula Eid

Insights 🔎:

  • Organizations actively encourage younger employees to "disrupt," but frequently lack the mature leadership structures required to protect them when they actually do.
  • The "courage gap" between junior and senior staff isn't about bravery; it is about the heavy accumulation of corporate political risks as you climb the ladder.
  • When 52% of your most vocal, energetic talent faces retaliation, your organization is actively training its future leaders to embrace silence.

Actions 🛠️:

  • If you manage early-career professionals, explicitly define what a "safe" challenge looks like and publicly back them when they deliver one constructively.
  • Audit your own career timeline: identify the specific year or role where you stopped speaking purely on facts and started "calculating" your words based on fear.

Quick Win ✅:

  • Reach out to the youngest or newest member of your team today and ask them for one piece of unvarnished feedback about a current project process.

2. Speaking Corporate (Reading the Room)

There is a massive difference between speaking up and actually being heard. Adejisola B H Atiba addressed a common frustration: sometimes you raise a valid point, the room ignores you, and ten minutes later, someone else says the exact same thing and receives all the credit. When this happens, our immediate reaction is to blame the bias of the room.

While bias certainly exists, Adejisola challenged us to take ownership of our delivery. She noted that her cultural background naturally brings a high level of passion and volume, which can easily be misinterpreted in a rigid corporate setting. If your goal is to drive change rather than just vent your frustrations, you must learn to package your truth. Reading the room, sensing the energy of the decision-makers, and altering your delivery method is not conforming, it is strategic communication.

"My culture culturally were loud. But I have learned to speak corporate because I want to be heard... It's just as simple as that. If you want to be heard, you need to read the room. You need to know who you're speaking to..." - Adejisola Atiba

Insights 🔎:

  • Your message will always be judged by its packaging; if your delivery is overly emotional or confrontational, the actual data will be ignored.
  • Adapting your communication style to your audience is not a betrayal of your authenticity; it is the price of executive influence.
  • If you consistently speak up but fail to gain traction, the problem is likely your lack of alignment with the room’s preferred processing style.

Actions 🛠️️:

  • Identify a key stakeholder who traditionally dismisses your ideas, and study how the people they do listen to format their arguments (e.g., visual data, brief emails, slow pacing).
  • Before your next high-stakes presentation, define the "emotional temperature" of the room and intentionally match your vocal pacing to that temperature.

Quick Win ✅:

  • The next time you feel ignored in a meeting, pause, lower your volume, and ask a clarifying question instead of repeating your statement louder.

3. The Private Agreement Epidemic

One of the most isolating experiences in corporate life is taking a major risk to speak up in a crowded room, receiving zero support, and then having three colleagues quietly message you after the meeting to say, "I completely agree with you". It happens all the time.

Sara ElFeky tackled this dynamic head-on. When you put your neck on the line, private agreement feels like a hollow consolation prize. However, Sara pointed out that we must respect that not everyone possesses the same risk tolerance or organizational capital to challenge leadership publicly. You cannot force others to fight your battles in real-time, but you can rely on your own integrity. If you have done your analytics, framed your argument professionally, and spoken the truth, you must be comfortable standing alone in the room.

"Sometimes some people don't have this courage to speak loudly or to say it in front of everyone. But believe me, if there is someone came to me and say that, Sarah, you did the right thing. I do appreciate it... but I always keep in mind... Say it right. Say it with integrity."  - Sara ElFeky

Insights 🔎:

  • Expecting your peers to instantly match your level of public courage is a recipe for resentment; risk tolerance varies wildly across a team.
  • Private agreement from peers validates your operational logic, even if the public silence highlights the political fear within the organization.
  • True leadership requires the maturity to stand alone on a factual reality without requiring a chorus of immediate public validators.

Actions 🛠️:

  • When a colleague approaches you privately to agree with a point you made, gently encourage them by asking, "Would you be willing to add a data point to support this in our next follow-up email?"
  • Practice the "Devil’s Advocate" pre-wire: before a major meeting, quietly ask a peer to deliberately probe your idea in front of the group so you aren't fighting solo.

Quick Win ✅:

  • If you see someone bravely dissent in a meeting today, immediately unmute or speak up to say, "That is a valid perspective we should explore," offering them the public cover they need.

4. Earning the Right to Speak

We often champion the idea that everyone’s voice should carry equal weight. In reality, that is not how high-stakes projects operate. You do not automatically have the right to challenge critical strategy simply because you were invited to the calendar invite. You have to earn that right through organizational capital.

During the chat, I reflected on a moment in a professional forum where someone aggressively attacked a colleague. The immediate response from the room wasn't about the content of the attack, but rather, "What gives you the right to speak to me that way?". Courage without competence is deeply irritating to executives. You must build an undeniable foundation of integrity and subject matter expertise. When you are genuinely a master of your domain, you don't have to demand a voice; the room will instinctively quiet down to hear what you have to say.

"We really need to know whether we've earned the right to speak in your room... even though you want to be courageous, competence and integrity... Seek to know rather than be known." - Dr. Charles Igwe

Insights 🔎:

  • Organizational capital is built through a track record of flawless execution and unquestionable integrity; you spend that capital when you challenge the status quo.
  • If you continuously dissent without first proving your baseline competence, leadership will quickly dismiss you as a chronic complainer.
  • True influence is organic; when you prioritize deep knowledge over shallow visibility, the organization will naturally seek out your perspective.

Actions 🛠️:

  • Conduct an audit of your recent feedback: ensure that for every one time you criticize or challenge a strategy, you have contributed three tangible, high-value solutions.
  • Identify the specific area of your project where your knowledge is currently surface-level, and spend this week mastering the underlying data to build your credibility.

Quick Win ✅:

  • Hold your tongue on the next minor, low-stakes issue that bothers you, actively conserving your organizational capital for a battle that actually impacts the project's bottom line.

Closing Note

Speaking up is not about proving how brave you are; it is about driving a better result for the project and the team. If your courage isn't paired with strategic delivery, empathy for the room, and undeniable competence, your words will simply bounce off the corporate armor. Speak your truth, but make sure you speak it in a language the room cannot ignore.

👇 Are you burning organizational capital without realizing it? Run your current professional strategy through the Competence Trap Wheel to expose your executive blind spots and discover if your delivery is holding back your influence: https://competencetrapwheel.ci3pro.ca/

Next up in Part 3: We will explore the messy reality of what happens after a project fails, how to disagree without being disagreeable, and why "psychological safety" is often just a meaningless checkbox for HR.